The trouble is we think we have time. This is so profound and yet so simple. And yet, that is exactly what I thought for years, and then one day it’s my 50th birthday! And what on earth am I doing?
I had left Corporate America a couple years earlier and pursued a path that was exciting for me, yet was not in complete alignment with who I was. I spent 6 years studying and practicing my new thing – homeopathy – before I realized that this was not it for me. I spent the next 3 years searching, learning new tools, and clearing my “sh*t” so that I could focus on the real me.
Well, interestingly enough, I am doing now exactly what I wanted to be doing almost 20 years ago and didn’t – for all the lame excuses that come up. When I attended college in the 70’s – I really wanted to be a psychologist. I was told I would need a Master’s or PhD to make any money, so I changed my major to Social Work (a place where you cannot make any money at all). I allowed myself to be directed by the voices outside of me vs. honoring my own intuition.
After 4 years as social worker, I wanted to earn more money and see more of the world. I studied Computer Sciences and changed careers – made more money and moved from VA to Dallas. About 2 years in, I realized that I was not in love with what I was doing. L But, I carried on – because I could and the money was great, slowly morphing to the people side of business and facilitating training and groups. While the jobs got more fulfilling, there was still something HUGE missing from my life. It had to do with meaning and FUN. I was finding it difficult to be inspired everyday by what I was doing for a large company. I craved more personal impact.
In that time, I completed coach training school – wanting to be a coach who works with people to live the life they really want. But apparently I was still not ready. Back to Corporate a few more years.
And now, my dream of working with women who are ready to give themselves the gift of time and priority to reclaim their purpose, to look at the legacy they are meant to leave the world, has come to full fruition.
I believe each of us is implanted with seeds of desire before we are born. Each desire is so individual and personal and shows up the moment we are born. Because each of us is made up differently in how we think, how sensitive we are, how bold we are, what we love, how we want to feel and express, sometimes well-meaning parents squash our desires because they do not understand. Sometimes we have met a challenge or shock or devastating circumstance in our lives at an early age that shuts down our desire.
And then we are sent to school where everyone is treated the same. We are taught things, not through exploring and seeking, but through force feeding subject matter that has to be taught.
All the while, we are learning, absorbing the world around us – learning about relationships from healthy and unhealthy role models, learning about how the world works, about money, about health and aging , about food, about our minds and bodies. We are so absorptive that we even learn from the unspoken.
And then we go to college and reject what our parents told us. We experiment and try things. And then one day we are deemed “adults” and go try to lead our own lives.
I felt like I was right on my path until I got married at age 34. Yes, I loved my husband. He is the total opposite of me. And what happened? I believed his way in the world was “better” that mine, that he knew more than me, that I should try to be more like him. And so I did. We were both plenty smart, but he had so much inner confidence that I was drawn to, so that I became more like him a thinker, and got right out of my heart – wrong direction for me. I couldn’t choose from my heart which way to go anymore, so I would analyze, and frankly it’s helpful to know some things from the head, but my heart knew what was best for my soul. But I spent 15 years making major decisions from my head. It’s no wonder I wandered so far from my path.
I believe for many women, especially if we grew up the oldest sibling, we got the bulk of the responsibility gene and the sensitivity gene. We are especially sensitive, yet put on a façade of strength. We are the responsible one – making sure everyone is taken care of and happy. Then we go through our married lives, make sure everyone around us has what they need and more, and our needs often go unmet, unnoticed, and unexpressed, until one day we have totally lost ourselves – what is in our heart, what we really think, what we really want, and what we are even here for.
But lucky for us, there is still time. If you are still walking, breathing, waking up every morning, your reason for being here isn’t done.
At this time in our lives we feel like we have more time, and now that we manage some alone time, some down time, we are hearing our soul’s callings more loudly. Years earlier, we didn’t have the bandwidth to even notice “our” dissatisfactions, our depressed moments, our own feelings of sadness and being lost. But now, alone for the first time, we hear them painfully clearly.
Now there is urgency. Now there is time. I want you to know, it doesn’t have to take YEARS to go from Heart Ache, Resentment, and Feeling like you wasted some of the best years of your life to finding your SPARKLE.
There is such a MAGNIFICENCE just below the surface waiting there for you – to find it, acknowledge it, to feed and water it, and gently allow it to blossom.
I love guiding and walking with women on their paths back to their true selves. If you are ready to take this Sacred Journey with me and start living from your true purpose, I want you to know:
I see you! I hear you! I am here for you!
This journey is for the right women – who are a great match to this program – only.0